Friday, February 5, 2016

Peyton Finally Tells the Truth! OMAHA!

.. and you thought that deflating balls was a serious issue!

Well, I wanted to have some fun with the latest conspiracy involving the NFL, and one of the star quarterbacks playing in the 50th edition of the Superb Owl! Seems the that older guy with the large forehead may have used HGH when rehabbing after his fourth neck surgery back in 2012.

Most of it is circumstantial right now, and people discredited the report initially for two reasons: (1) the main source recanted his story within 24 hours of the new story coming out, and (2) it was produced by Al Jazeera America, which many people said, "isn't that the middle eastern new organization that hates the US of A? Why should we listen to anything those rat bastards have to say?!? America .. FUCK YEAH!"

Well, since then, it has come out that YES, there were shipments of HGH sent out to Pey-Pey's house addressed to his wife, and most likely the prescription was illegal, as HGH is not supposed to be used for fertility purposes (they were said to be trying to conceive, and the next year they gave birth to twins so there is that) The QB also went all over the world looking for ways to rehab himself back to health too. We also know that he hired Ari Fleisher, who was the press secretary for the Bushes to handle damage control over the situation .. who sent one or two men in black outfits (private investigators) to the accusers family house the night before he recanted .. and there is a 911 phone call where the man's sister called to complain that men that said they were law enforcement wouldn't show a badge .. probably because they didn't have one. Those guys also showed up at the doctor's office, where they said they didn't find anything that could incriminate Peyton. If there *IS* anything still there, they obviously weren't doing their job properly, were they?

Lastly, after sitting out that season, he came back and threw for the most touchdowns in NFL history, regaining a record he had set years earlier (2004), and that had been broken in 2007 by .. Tom Brady. He also threw SEVEN touchdown passes in one game that same season. So one year after wondering if he would ever play again, he came back to have his BEST SEASON EVER in an already Hall of Fame career.

Of course, with serious accusations like this, the league will launch an independent investigation and unlimited amounts of money to get to the bottom of this, right? HAHAHA! It doesn't involve the Patriots so who gives a donkey's spleen about all of this? So, the least I can do is make fun of this in the best way I know possible .. a TG caption.

BTW, the model is only wearing sneakers and body paint. No uniform at all there and looking good!

Hope everyone enjoys watching the Superb Owl on Sunday night (or at least the commercials!) and I will be rooting for the Panthers to do what Seattle did two years ago, just dismantle the Broncos, and let the ancient one ride off into the sunset with another Superb Owl loss, and only one ring.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: SO, which team are you rooting for? Which company will have the best commercial? What'd you think of the caption?


  1. Love the caption! I'll be looking forward to seeing Manning knocked down on Sunday

    1. Yeah, either way is fine. 'Knocked down' tomorrow, or 'knocked up' here in this caption!

  2. Love the caption and the model. I cant really comment on the teams but hope you enjoy a good game may the best team win.

  3. Fun cap, even if my interest in football doesn't go beyond watching the VC Angels play.

    I have to admit, for years I only knew Mojo Nixon from his collaboration with Jello Biafra on 'Prarie Home Invasion'. The CD still brings me in a weirdly good mood.

  4. This is a delicious caption Dee, even if it is so full of jealous rage. lol. Tom Brady is cuter than Peyton, so what the hey!

    1. Haha jealous rage! I just think it isn't quite a level playing field when the league makes a claim that Brady deflated balls, which was shown to have been in line with the Ideal Gas Law, and didn't affect a game the Pats won by over 30 points .. gets a suspension and possible appeal to the friggin' Supreme Court when Manning, "more probable than not" used PED's to come back and have a season that was better than the peak years of his Hall of Fame career, gets a "meh, whatever" from the Commish when Manning's crime affected way more of the integrity of the game.