Yeah, this caption isn't quite politically correct, but yew all came here all for dah captionz and stuff!
I might have been able to find an English to southern redneck translator, but it was much more .. eventful for me to try to do this on mah own! Seriously, my brain hurts now from writin' like dis, and Ay gonna need ta do bigly book-learnin' ta gets mahself back to da smartlypants I wuz befowa!
This may or may not be a fantasy for you .. I can't say that being all dolled up and bimbotized as a former beauty show contestant with big hair and lots of makeup who sounds like a southern doll isn't something I hadn't thought about. Your mileage may vary .. but I thought this might be an interesting psychology experiment in caption format at the very least .. and play with some of the dynamics of parents and their offspring. Momma probably didn't like him too much because he was very much the same as his Dad. However, if he was born female, then she'd definitely want to bond, and get him involved with child pageants and cheerleading and all that fun stuff she did before the old man knocked her up right out of high school.
And I was thinking about the song, "Fancy" most famously done by Reba McEntire. Hell, I'm pretty sure I've done at least ONE other caption based on the song. Here's one of them, just click RIGHT HERE! The song is about a mother who dolls up her oldest daughter and makes her an "escort" so that she could escape her poor life. Figured that would be a good starting point here, though I think she is going to try to be an honest woman if at all possible.
So, this is a blog exclusive. Comment away, and you can bitch at me for using stereotypes if you wish, but TG captions can be so rife with them, I don't think it'll be too much water off my back! Anyone else have something like this as a fantasy? Give details below please!
Hurts my brain to read language like this, although I did discover there's a HUGE TG Land fan base down in the South. That's right, some local country boy dream about being Southern Belles!
ReplyDeleteI would definitely reckon that there would be, I do declare!
DeleteBeats going to jail y'all
ReplyDeleteDefinitely true, unless you consider becoming a female to be a punishment. Can't imagine most people that are visiting my blog would feel that way though .. well, maybe a token amount of resistance, but only expressed to others!
DeleteMy wife and I have been discussing other places to live as it seems this goddamned virus is going to leave her working from home for the foreseeable future....we were considering the Gettysburg area of Pennsylvania....she loves it there and I'm a history buff...but after our trip there a couple of years ago and knowing some people who've already gone there we're thinking now about the Knoxville area of Tennessee....lots of room....low taxes...nice people....lower cost of living....and I love the southern accent....just speak to me with that drawl and I'm rubbing my thighs together!!!
ReplyDeleteAnyways....loved the cap...my wife did too!!!
Kisses
Kaaren
I have always wondered if that Southern Hospitality is actual niceness, or if it's of a more passive-aggressive type that is harder to read. I am definitely of New England stock, and while we aren't as nice, you sort of have a very good idea how people think of you at all times. I had an acquaintance from the south tell me that being a southern lady meant knowing 20 different ways to say "go fuck yourself" without actually voicing the sentiment. "Bless your heart" is apparently a huge putdown!
DeleteAnd yes, there are some wonderful accents down there, and some hideous ones too. I lived in Florida 'for a spell' when I was younger, and I could not adapt to it at all. Things were so much slower than here, where everyone is hauling ass through life. I'm more on that pace, but wonder if that is how they deal with the constant heat and humidity.
To heck with political correctness - who doesn't want to be dolled up and bimbotized? The struggle to read and understand, to put ourselves in her head, is all part of the fun!
ReplyDeleteI think not being a bimbo, and trying to think, act, and talk like one is the actual hard part .. it certainly can be fun if you can get in that headspace!
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