Saturday, June 22, 2013

Taking Care of the Tree Huggers!

Singing Kumbaya is not going to help you Wendy!

Actually MADE a caption today! Wooo! I got to hang out on the Haven a bit as well, since there is/was a discussion started by Jezebel about breaking the fourth wall / Meta-ness in captions. Faithful reader Helena (where'd she go!) mentioned that I have done at least a few like that posted here on this blog. I figured I would throw my 2 cents in even when I wasn't quite asked to do so!

Anyway, back to THIS caption! It was a totally new creation, and not something I had set up for future captioning. I went through Wendy's preferences and then took a glance at her pictures folder. She seems to REALLY like the outdoors, as quite a few of the captions for me involve Dryads and other mythical creatures in the woods.

I started writing it on the fly, as this picture (edited for size and extraneous woods) spoke to me. I knew that nature somehow had done this to her, but I wanted it to have "evil" win, at least in its execution. I figured that using my last name as a corporate entity seemed like a good play, and honestly, it could be considered a prequel to a few captions she made for me, which shows how I was changed into a woodsprite or dryad. Once I became a CEO, I wanted to have a JAMES BOND villain monolog explaining what happened, and since this is me, why not even reference the fact that I'm doing it just like they would.

The theme of nature wound through this, and it was by choice. Nature is pretty, provides sustenance, and is also destructive, unreliable, and random. Man and nature have been co-existing, and battling, each other throughout our time on this planet, and will continue to do so without end until we become extinct. Trust me, We are the ones that need to be saved, not the earth. It was here before we evolved, and will still be here unless we blow up the planet into tiny pieces. Even after that, those rocks will impact other forms of life over the infinite time of this universe.

I wrote in the Haven post:
Well, first off, evil never seems to win as much as it should! I said it and I'd say it again!

Secondly, while I admit to being a bit of an environmentalist, I have referred to the fact the cause should be changed to "Save the Humans!" and anything environmental would be taken seriously.

Thirdly, I have so many friggin' allergies, I wouldn't mind nature being turned into a parking lot whenever my sinuses act up .. like they have in the last few days!

So, on that note, I give you this latest caption, fresh off the grill! Hope you like it!


PS. Now that I don't each that much meat due to health reasons, people will ask if I'm doing it because I love animals. I usually say, "No, not really. I just REALLY hate veggies and wish to inflict as much pain on them as humanly possible!"
The best "evil" characters are those that believe that their motivations are correct and that they just have a different (or better) moral compass than everyone else. This villain has technically harnessed nature to heal/change peoples bodies on a molecular level, using things provided by nature, and cutting down some rain forests and/or other woods is a necessary thing for the benefit of mankind. The justification is in the results ... Hell, Mentia Consolidated Holdings has ended world hunger, as people could now survive off of sunlight! I mentioned GMO food in a caption a week or two ago, and this is the flip side of all that. Monsanto and other corporations think they are doing everyone a favor and creating heartier crops that can survive longer periods of time .. all at a reasonable profit margin.

Wow, a mini-discussion on morals and where a person can draw the line in the sand. Not quite your average TG caption topic I gather.


  1. Interesting cap! Mmm, changing people's bodies on a molecular level. . .

    You make a good point with your "Save the Humans!" comment. I eat meat but I think it is important to care about and for the environment and for the feelings and well-being of animals and the well-being of plants but life WILL find a way whatever we do, as you pointed out. Environmentalism is labelled "liberal" but it is actually very conservative (same root as "conservationist"). Environmentalists are trying to conserve the biological status quo or return to a recently lost bio-balance. If we don't look after the enviroment, there will definitely still be flora and fauna but it'll be less of the spotted owl, grey whale and orchid sorts and more of the cockroach, brown rat and smelly alga sorts. It's all still flourishing DNA but CEOs of eco-villain corporations and your ordinary working-class wasteful person might not like the results of using the environment too liberally.

    Oh, yeah, and that pic is so hawt. I guess he/she has to stand like that for a while each day to photosynthesize, right? Nice display.

  2. Just a further thought as if my comment above weren't long already: If John can now photosynthesize, shouldn't she be green? I love the cap and photo combo above but the cap would also work really well with an image of one of those hot green chicks from Star Trek. E. g.: = )

    1. Two choices on my part because I had thought the same thing at first:

      (1) Wendy supplied the picture and I am not sure she'd appreciate me tinting the model green. If I had found it, I might have taken to the time to do so.

      (2) Any company that would try to see the product would really worry about the side effects, as evidenced by Olestra's commercial that mentioned "anal leakage" so they must've figured out another way. Perhaps UV light or another wave length of the sun's rays.

      On Wikipedia, "The non-absorbed part of the light spectrum is what gives photosynthetic organisms their color (e.g., green plants, red algae, purple bacteria) and is the least effective for photosynthesis in the respective organisms." Then again, this is a TG caption first and foremost, and we shouldn't worry about things like this! LOL

  3. The Haven!
    Well, actually I've been busy in R-L lately, May and June usually are busy months for me. Lots of birthdays, and this year some other festivities as well. Basically time-consuming but good stuff.
    But I haven't been away that long have I?

    Lovely caption you made for Wendy. Her knowledge of mythological beings is actually quite impressive. She made me a caption about "Witte Wieven" the term itself is dialect, literally meaning "white women" A local folklore from the parts of the east of the Netherlands, small parts of Belgium and France (in French they're called "Dame Blanche")
    Outside the parts where they are part of the folklore even most Dutch don't know them, so Wendy knowing about them... Wow.
    I have to say you did a very good job as a James Bond villain. Only Gert Fröbe did a better job in my opinion.
    People nourished by sunlight? It would leave Wendy very skinny, her being British;)

    "Nature is pretty, provides sustenance, and is also destructive, unreliable, and random."
    And so is man. If we make ourselves extinct, we wouldn't even be a footnote in Earth's history. Different life forms would evolve, as that is the way of nature.
    Of course it wouldn't hurt us not to hurry our own extinction.

    I don't hate vegetarians, as long as they don't try to convert me. But a statement like: "I'm not a vegetarian, I eat vegetarians." is something that drives them up the wall. For the record, I don't eat humans, but other animals that live of plants, even if I don't eat as much meat as I used to. In my case, I guess I've lost my taste for meat a bit.

    On another note, how is your daughter doing now? I hope she's getting better already.

    1. She's getting there. Waiting for the incision part to be healed properly now and about 2 weeks more of antibiotics.

      I didn't realize she knew that much about folklore. Perhaps I can use that in another caption since I owe her a few. Thanks for the info!

  4. great video choice to go with the caption. philosophy and tg caps cool if only I had a couple of hours have been reading a lot of Ayn Rand about selfishness and.....

  5. Great cap and great conversation topic Dee!

    I'm with you in thinking that we need to focus on saving our current way of life as opposed to saving the environment. Even with all our weapons we puny humans don't have the power to 'kill the earth'. We can only change it so that it's inhabitable by humans. And seeing as we don't have a way to terraform other planets, then we simply have the power to destroy ourselves.

    I think one good argument for environmentalism would be to show what the world would be like if it continues along it's current path. Sure, rising seas are scary, but consider what each ecosystem would also go through... deserts would be even more hospitabile, garden and farming areas would become more desert like and the northern tundras would become more ideal for farming. Do we really want to rely on Canada and Russia to be the world's bread basket?

    I had to laugh at Helena's comment about the British being skinny if they had to rely on the sun for nourishment. I immediately pictured big fat overweight Ethiopians sending packaged sunlight to the poor northern folk who can't get enough 'food'. "Can't you spare a few minutes of sunlight to save the children?"

    1. That does tend to be the big question, "how can we sustain the amount of living things on this blue marble revolving around the sun?" Makes you wonder if we've hit maximum capacity and are a pandemic or two away from taking some pressure off the Earth and its sustenance production.

      Hate to sound like a pessimist, but I think that the lack of a really big war in the last 40-50 years is one reason the US and other world economies are stagnant. More older people using social security longer, and more competition for jobs among active younger people.

    2. I think that's the key. How do we sustain all of us. When you look at worldwide numbers it boggles the mind how we can sustain us as is, not to mention the population growth. One of the problems, in my mind at least, is that the United States is invested in this problem only on a theoretical way. Just look at our population density (number of people per square mile) as opposed to other countries (Data culled from here:

      India: 989
      Japan: 873
      United Kindgom: 673
      Germany: 583
      Italy: 513
      China: 365
      France: 303
      United States: 89
      Russia: 21
      Canada: 10

      We here in the states just don't see the problem first hand. We have a lot of people but they are spread out over a vast area. Do you think people in Wyoming (population density of 5.8) care how much land is required to sustain them? And yet we have near the biggest say (if not THE biggest say) in how the world treats the environment.

      Add in the world population explosion of the last 60 years and the lack of any major war, famine, or plague to cull the population and you have a recipe for disaster. We've made living longer and killing less people a priority without considering whether the world (as we currently know it) can handle all these people. Just imagine if we had true world peace and lived an average lifespan of 100 years.


    3. Don't worry, Caitlyn; death is a certainty; we're not just going to fill the world up. We don't need war(of which there is still plenty, anyway, whether North American mainstream media feel like covering it all or not). Some supposedly crowded countries actually have lots of room in them (e.g., China) and seem crowded largely because the population is crowded into a relatively small part of the land mass. Another factor is man-made national borders. As you point out, there are roomy countries and crowded or relatively-crowded countries and then there are really roomy countries. But we're all one species that has a whole planet we should be sharing and using wisely. Zimbabwe is in a really bad way but so much of its arable land is dedicated to tobacco (a starvation crop). Similarly, Afghanistan but the starvation crop there is poppies (for opium/heroine) There is a lot of starvation-crop cultivation and war and political corruption wherever people are starving. Starvation is the result of the rest. Monaco is crowded and there's no war or political instability or starvation there. Also compare/contrast the 2 Koreas. Pollution produced in North America causes harmful climate-change in Africa. Almost all the world's wealth is in the hands of a tiny percentage of the world's population. It's the countries with the low birth rates that produce almost all the pollution and that are responsible for almost all the consumption of resources; not the countries that still have high birth-rates. There can be enough; we just have to start giving a crap about long-term and butterfly-effects. We have to stop telling Black people in Africa that there are too many of them in the world and that, if they don't like starving, they should stop having kids and commit self-genocide. They're not the ones using everything up!

      And "John" in that pic above looks so good with her arms stretched up like that! Hawttt!!!