Apparently free soda and popcorn makers isn't enough! Wonder what Google and Apple does?!?
Perhaps employees get to spend lots of time in virtual realities in those companies .. plus lots of stock options! I'm sure that helps too!
But it is not everything, you know! Having the right boss with the right temperament could make all the difference when each worker is putting in 80+ hours a week. And who honestly cares if the sales staff gets to shave the head of their 50 something boss who's already 70 bald anyway?!?
So what happens when you sink all your money into technology, and you aren't much of a techie? Well, you have to rely on people that are much smarter than you and probably don't have the social graces needed to function in the real world. And maybe you don't know what motivates them? That or they gave you some ideas but you didn't think it was practical, and how were they to figure out exactly how their apps worked when you fired most of the Research and Development employees? Well, I think we've got a good idea now with this caption. A slutty bimbo dominatrix apparently!
Or maybe that's just one of the modes they have programmed into Harm aka Helena. Perhaps you can tell me exactly what their apps do, or what are they supposed to do, and how did they modify the code to modify their boss? Maybe these apps could make another appearance in caption format?
As the tech guys "fix" more of the computers and the workforce becomes gradually more female, the soda replaced by cocktails and the popcorn becomes dainty mini treats (all still laced with oestrogen) and in house spa treatments, yoga, and break rooms with couches and beds for when the boyfriends visit, productivity has gone through the glass ceiling and into orbit
ReplyDeleteHmm, there needs to be a good ratio of women bosses to computer guys though. I would think that corporate sponsored hot oil contests between management would work better than yoga, unless it's naked yoga!
DeleteOMG just wait until the nerds add break room blowjobs to the app!!!!
ReplyDeleteSoon before you know it....chaos erupts as the app is mistakenly released to the public.....when suddenly from within all the halls of power all that you could hear was....
"Hi Honey....you're pretty cute....why don't you come in and relax!!!!"
Sigh...if only....
Kisses
Kaaren
I'm up for something different in government. Can't be any worse than what we've got now with mostly old white guys running the world.
DeleteMaybe the boss will get even with the app developers and turn their app against them and get them to join in the fun. Great cap as always!
ReplyDeleteIt does make a case for not wanting to get promoted though. Or maybe it does!
DeleteApparently I'm drinking the wrong diet soda - or maybe I just need to add the popcorn. Working from home does have its advantages, but the downside is there's never any risk of being properly managed like this. I wonder if they have an opening . . .
ReplyDeleteWhen I was young and "diet soda" was strictly for girls (remember Tab and how PINK the damn can was?) I wondered if a guy could turn into woman by drinking enough of it. Who knows what saccharine really does to a body? LOL
DeleteAnd wouldn't you rather be the boss at the office? I don't think you can lose either way, but look at those big shoes that bosses have to fill!
(Hoping I won't forget to press "Publish"like I did yesterday :D )
ReplyDeleteLike I said at the Haven, "Where has the time gone when a working coffee machine was enough to keep people motivated."
I've seen a few times that the coffee machine broke down before our break, and coworkers flat out refused to get back to work, unless they got their cup of coffee, none of them being impressed by threat of immediate dismissal.
While this would be a great way to keep me motivated, even without my coffee, I doubt you would get my coworkers to go back to work like this, even with the free sodas and popcorn.