Saturday, December 19, 2015

They Aren't Just Ornamental! They Were Functional Too!

Not everyone that bears gifts on Christmas has a heavy sack!

Well, this happens to be the first Christmas caption I had made this year, back in the middle of November. It is an interesting thing, because every year, I say to myself, "So, you had a bunch of great captions last year. How are you ever going to top it this year?" Well, I never really know, but I sort of prepare myself that at worst case scenario, I'll make 2 Christmas captions no matter how shitty they are! I start them early too, and that takes the pressure off slightly.

So, once I make the first one, that usually makes it easier to do more .. and that I can branch out to something totally different than the first, and the second, etc .. This is my failsafe for unseen issues like medical problems for either me or members of my family, possible computer foul ups, or just a severe lack of time and energy at the end of the year. I mean, I have most likely done at least 20-25 captions for the holidays in the month of December, and each year forward I tend to make another 4-6 so you can only milk a cat so many times before it tries to murderkill you in your sleep.

And now that I've set up the entire week's worth of posts (I started from Christmas Day and worked backwards writing them up) I can say that this one is the cutest one with a slightly shocking ending that you probably didn't see coming. Most of the rest of the captions are not this subtle. This year's captions are more over-the-top than in previous years, trust me!

The gist of this caption came out fairly well formed. I saw the picture, there are balls on the tree, and the dog probably doesn't have his to lick anymore .. which made me think that if she was a guy once, then neither of them have balls anymore! I chose the name Duke because it seems like one of the most masculine dog names you could have, particularly if he was named after John Wayne.

Remember we still have the DIY Challenge for December running. I think I have one submission so far, and we still have plenty of time for you to whip something up. Also, make sure you drop by every day as we'll be posting daily through Christmas Day. I'm sure you'll find something to catch your fancy. Try not to fall asleep tonight during the Cowboys - Jets game like I'm doing right now!

Since both "Schweddy Ball's" and "Dick in a Box" from Saturday Night Live aren't available on Youtube, here is an epic version of "Drummer Boy / Peace of Earth" done by Jack Black and Jason Segal  Of course, the original was done by Bing Crosby and David Bowie.


  1. LOL, this makes me wonder about the dogs thoughts. Does Duke miss hiss balls, or would Duke have wanted to become Duchess completely.

    No music? You did fall asleep right away. ;)

    1. Well, I went to bed after posting this, so yes I did. I am sort of getting sick of not being able to snag the actual songs I want to post here from Google, so I thought about giving up. Perhaps I'll once again post some Christmas songs I really like. Of course, they'll most likely be repeats, but they are still good ones!

  2. haha! Funny Caption, Dee!

  3. While mine are technically functional they have been ornamental for the most part, since my Sweetie discovered chastity! Just as well....if you wanted to use them on a tree you'd really need a much smaller tree to make them noticeable!!!
    Duke at least can lick himself if he wants....the last time I tried that I nearly broke my neck!!!!

    1. Reminds me of that old joke.
      Guy sees a dog licking itself, and says to another guy, "Damn! I wish *I* could do that!" and the other guys says, "well, you'd probably have to rub his belly first!"