It has been a sad 24 hours or so since I found out that Petra will be resigning her admin position at the Haven and wandering off into the sunset. Its totally on her terms, as she's found a sweetheart of a gal that is moving in with her next week after almost a year of long distance dating. You can find the post HERE if you want to read the whole thing and are a member of the Haven.
It does make me sad BUT it also makes me really happy, as I often hear so many real-life TG stories that don't end particularly well. She's just not going to have the time to fulfill her duties AND she doesn't want to keep any secrets from her new love. As per her post:
This is by no means a decision I am making where I'm choosing to suppress any of my desires or feelings or as a means to hide anything. I've just come to a point in my life where this reality of me being Petra is no longer something that I want to pursue with vigor.I don't think she made any secret of the fact that she was here to have fun and play with some friends. I mean the fact that her screen name was "PLAYIN PETRA" was probably a dead giveaway. That she isn't haunted by feelings that she isn't in the right body to match her mind or anything like that does make me glad that she can walk away and feel charmed to have known us.
It doesn't hurt any less though to know that I won't have her around that much anymore. However, knowing that she is at an incredible new chapter in her life gives me much joy. AARRGGHH, once again I'm in that happy/sad crying mood again. I am not sure how the hell women can put themselves through this?!? Yes, Dee is in "fried green tomatoes" mode!
TG sites come and go. Only a few really have a lifespan longer than a year or two. The fact that some even spawn communities is amazing. I guess what gets me is that many people that I considered contemporaries are starting to vanish into the ether, and are now compiled in the Haven archives, "banished" to the inactive trading folders, or disappear forever (like when Geocities finally collapsed) with only a faded memory.
I love the fact that there is always new blood making captions. Its what keeps things interesting and evolving. I dread that we are such a "anonymous" type collective that people can appear, make some part of an impact, then vanish without most people knowing the back story at all. If you were there, you know and remember, but otherwise its quite fleeting. With this situation, its nice that we have a chance to mention to her how much she's meant to us.
Others like Wildcard barely get a thought by most people now. Jayne was an active member of the Haven a number of years ago and was impacted by one of the major hurricanes. She made some thoughtful captions, and was a good friend, though others probably felt closer to her (Simone for instance) like the way I felt about Pea. She took care of real life things and is hopefully succeeding in life with her wonderful kids. To anyone though that hasn't been around much until recently though, she's just another folder they'll never look through, not someone that was worth knowing.
Why do I mention people like Simone, Jennifer, Pea, and others so often? Because they matter, and they matter in a big way in my life. I hope these people think that I matter to them as well. When Caitlyn says that she has an infection .. I care! And when she passes her nursing exam, I will be so excited for her, even though it means less captions to look at! I am happy when Alectra passes all her exams .. and pissed off when people insult someone I consider a friend.
I am SOOO glad I'm not wearing mascara right now because I'd be totally raccoon eyed right now!
I look forward to meeting the next Petra, and the next Bimbo Jessica .. while still enjoying the Rachel, Steffie, Courtney, Bren and Martha's because they are here for me. All the people that post here .. you have enriched my life so much and I want you to know that.
This post has gone on long enough, and I didn't even really get to everything I wanted to talk about. I'm sure I've lost about half my readers by now anyway LOL
If you are a visitor who doesn't usually comment and surfs the internet looking for the latest captions ... do you belong to Rachel's Haven? There are THOUSANDS of captions there .. both in the gallery (it as a ton of yahoo and lycos group archives among others) and in the trading area. Do yourself a favor and join if you haven't yet. If you do belong, head into the trading area and just start looking through the inactive member folders. Don't ignore the captions just because their owners aren't participating in trades anymore. They are still great quality captions! Its a great way to kill a rainy day afternoon!
DISCUSSION QUESTION: Do you, the readers, mind me getting serious now and again? If so, should I mark it with a warning for those who just want to look at the pretty captions and wank away? In the past, people have wanted me to open up and let the light inside my head. This post happens to be one of those times. Feel free to talk about anything I said in the post. I will try to answer every comment for those that want a reply.