Saturday, December 19, 2020

A Double Shot of Holiday Captions! Yeah, I Think I Made One Too Many This Year!


And I'm definitely going to hell for creating this holiday movie poster! Praise Jehovah!

I thought I had an extra blog posting spot to fill, so I wiped this up .. then when I counted, I'd be posting late on Christmas Day for the following day, and my last Christmas caption should be posted right before Christmas Day happens. Hcnce, this caption was superfluous in the grand scheme of things. But since I am already a day late for the end of Hanukkah, I am giving you even more value tonight!

I need to start out saying that typical racist quote, "I know Jewish people!" in defending what I am posting here. But what I was trying to do is lampoon the Hallmark Channel, and the dreck they make for movies this time of year. And I wonder how many romantic Hanukkah movies they've actually made?

I would guess they have superficial knowledge at best about the holiday .. which works out well for me, because I threw in just about everything I know, which comes from said friends and the Adam Sandler songs. I didn't even watch the animated movie he wrote and starred in.

And trust me .. there aren't a hell of a lot of images that pop up when you google "sexy Hanukkah". Pretty slim pickings, truth be told. So, anyone of Jewish faith .. please don't take this seriously .. I was just having some fun .. and the amount of times I've picked on Christians, I figure it's only fair!


This was the first Christmas caption I made this year, and I think the lesson to be learned here is .. don't start too early unless you have a GREAT idea! Actually, I don't think it's that bad at all, and certainly better than the MILF one I put up the other day. There is a great moral to the story, especially for someone who only recently became a woman, and one that I learned way back in the day when a girlfriend of mine went to a wedding in a one-piece suit. She drank too much there, and had to keep getting undressed to use the potty! So, at least ONE of these captions is based on a true story!


If I do go to hell, I'll be hanging out with Spinal Tap!

12 comments:

  1. You know, there just aren't enough Hanukkah movies out there, instead of recycling the same X-Mas plot over and over I think that Hallmark should take a tip from you and branch out. And why stop with Hanukkah? There's got to be a screenwriter willing to make a Saturnalia rom-com, right?

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    1. We can only hope that they will start expanding their horizons to become more inclusive! However, you are a writer of some renown, so you better get on that, so when they come looking, you'll already have something in hand!

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  2. Ah, but Jovan is the one who will be looking for that magic kiss... so SHE will have to find it..... I see her kissing the hunky teller, falling for each other, and when she thinks all is lost, it is revealed the ruthless banker is only a managing partner for the family trust, and his older brother had the controlling 51%.... and the hunk is his nephew, learning the business from the ground up... and essentially Ruthless's boss.... and the teller swoops Jovan up in his arms to happily ever after....

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    1. I think you fleshed it out in a fashion that I was leaning into when i made it.

      Which means that YOU have watched way too many Hallmark Holiday movies OR you poor thing .. love someone who has watched way too many Hallmark Holiday movies! Maybe both?

      Glad you got into it though! Nice to see someone get the references.

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  3. Hmm, not just ugly Christmas sweaters out there.

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    1. Yes indeed. Ugly holiday sweaters are universal in nature, I believe!

      And for sexy Hanukkah pictures, it was either this one, or a lady wearing an R2D2 bathing suit holding up a menorah. While I liked the 2nd one, it didn't really fit on a Hallmark Holiday Movie poster!

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  4. What a wonderful couple of caps Dee....I remember my best friend when I was little was Jewish....and I well remember the fun of Hanukah at his house...eight nights!!!!
    We only got one....but ultimately I think we got better presents...or maybe it was just because we got them all at once....
    I think you've posted the very first Hanukah cap I've seen this year!!!!
    Keep spreading the joy of the Holiday Season Dee!!!
    Kisses
    Kaaren

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    1. Yeah, in 5th grade, my friend brought in a dreidel, and our homeroom teacher let us play the day before winter vacation started. Either he used a loaded dreidel, or more likely, he was REALLY good at it. I was the only one who won occasionally, other than him. If they had dreidel spinning in Vegas, he'd have cleaned out that place more than once!

      I've not seen many Hanukkah captions since I've been around in the community, so I thought it was an untapped source of inspiration, but I think I put almost everything I know into it, so perhaps MAYBE a sequel next year? Wouldn't count on it though!

      I will do my best to keep things going on the holiday front .. I've got 5 more captions left to post in .. Dee's Christmas Caption Extravaganza!!

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  5. I don’t get the 1st caption unfortunately, but I do like the sweater, hehehe. The 2nd caption is hilarious how the the new girl forgot about pee pee issues, but it’s a lovely jumpsuit. You’re also giving us a Christmas Extravaganza, we all certainly need cheering up and Dee to the rescue, yay!

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    1. I am happy that I can help to cheer you up! People commenting makes me happy too, so I'm glad you are around to pitch in and keep us all in the spirit!

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  6. Two-for-one captions, PLUS some Spinal Tap? You're totally spoiling us, Dee, but I suspect you already knew I was a Spinal Tap fan with my Haven caption. :)

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    1. Yes, indeed I was in the know about that, along with most of other songs you placed into your Haven caption.

      It's interesting that this just might be the year with the most holiday captions I have posted here. Maybe it's because we all need the pick-me-up, or perhaps I also have the most time on my hands, or perhaps a bit of both.

      But barring any sort of internet or health issues, there will be a caption every night through to Christmas Day. They are all written up and just ready for me to hit the "publish" button!

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