But none of that weird "mom wants to hook up with you," Back to the Future !ncest stuff!
Yes, BTTF is a film classic, but there are a ton of weird elements to it that are slightly off, and I wonder if a bunch of those PornHub stepmom fantasy fetishes come from a steady dose of Back to the Future and Brady Bunch episodes. It's definitely not a thing for me, but that could also be that one day while I was going through my dad's VHS porn stash, I found a polaroid of .. the place I came out of .. AND I almost threw up! I still watched the porn, but it took much longer to get hard that time, trust me when I say that!
I liked the image, though it's probably AI, and I got a time travelling vibe for it .. and since it's still Pride month, I wanted to work that into it somehow. So I worked with that, put in a BTTF2 reference, the 1985 for the original BTTF movie, and then a few other time travel bits of pop culture like the whole "would you go back in time and kill baby H!tIer?" trope. In this case, the protagonist is such a queen that they'd rather win a contest (I had just finished watching To Wong Fu, so I bet it inspired this caption too!) than do something good for the history of the world. It's not in the caption, but I had set this up as a "one time only" travel to the past and then back to the present day.
Well at least until the butterfly effect goes into place, and everything end up tits akimbo. There's a reference to dads in this, so it does tie in to Father's Day happening today.
Hope you enjoy this one, and do comment. as I'll be out with my daughter when this is posted, she's taking me out to eat. What would you do if you have a time machine? Would you fuck around and find out, or just sort of observe things, and then write history books about the real story of what happened?
Love me some Ryan George comedy. Thought everyone would enjoy all three of his Back to the Future: Pitch Meetings. Plus, I really didn't want to post a Huey Lewis and the News song today.
I'd likely love to walk around and look where I could. I mean, can't go back to the Crucifixion, when everyone around is 5 feet tall, brown, and speaking Aramaic, some pale six footer speaking English stands out like Godzilla .... (recall the first translations of the Bible had that giant, Goliath of Gath, at the monstrous.. 6 foot 4.) But gee, for a crazy parlay... no AFL team ever won the Super bowl... how about I take them, paired with the never even won as many as they lost Mets for the following World Series - and say they will BOTH beat Baltimore?
ReplyDeleteSo yeah, have fun. A few trips to random times, just to SEE how things are. Watch Babe Ruth play. Hit the Cavern to see the early Beatles. Jimi at Woodstock. Then buy land in NYC or LA. Speculative stock picks. TI before the integrated circuit. Walmart. Early Microsoft and Apple. Nvidia. A hundred bucks of baseball cards in 1952 will surely get a few Mickey Mantle rookie cards. Stuff that won't make such waves, except financially. Might be tempted to tell King to order in, though.
Good point. I always hoped that if I went back in time, I'd have a babelfish to translate, like in the old Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. Maybe have an invisible bubble where people can't see me, and we wouldn't be able to exchange germs that could wipe us out .. so I could just observe things in real time, but not be an active participant.
DeleteAnd wherever you were able to lay down a bet for Jets and Mets to win both .. and beat the Baltimore teams? You'd make a windfall, but probably have your legs broken afterwards!
I remember back when Apple was almost bankrupt in 1997 and was almost sold outright to Microsoft (or Bill Gates) right before Steve Jobs was brought back. I had actually thought about buying some, but figured they'd just crash and burn and I'd never see a payout. Right now, if I had bought 100 bucks worth of Apple stock (at 10 cents a share!) I'd have around 250k in money, with those 833 shares now would be around 46k of shares. GAH!
Funny cap Dee! I nearly lost some coffee through my nose at the last half of the last paragraph.
ReplyDeleteWhenever I get into the thoughts of timetravel I always get into the weeds. Paradoxes, physical displacement (what happens to the air where I was?), diseases, languages, clothing, money. I think a real fun time travel story is Stephen King's 11/22/63. The subject gets to travel back in time to save Kennedy, but he can only travel back to 1961 and has to live back there for two years. And after he screws up, he has to go back again, for ANOTHER two years to fix it.
Anyway, what would I do beyond making money with future information? Nothing. The past was constantly improved on to make the present. I'm not satisfied with the present so what makes me think I'd be happy with a pre-release version of the present?
I talked about how I'd deal with time travel in my response to Fiona. I'm glad you liked my zinger, as for me, it was what made the caption work. In a way, I try to make sure that most of my captions have a define starting point and an ending that sort of ties it all together, a la Lebowski's rug. But there are times when I also lean into Norm MacDonald's storytelling where you sort of go off elsewhere and bring everything back together in a slightly jarring way. I can also picture his voice saying the text out loud, which brings it all to another level!
DeleteOh, and one last thing... while I try not to kink shame, I've never understood the whole relative but not a direct icky relative style porn. Step mom, but not real mom. Step sister, but not full sister. I mean... why even family? Did I miss something by not having sisters?
ReplyDeleteWell, we now know that Caitlyn is not a royal!
DeleteI feel all redneck-y for saying this, but when I was 17 I went to a family funeral, and there was this really hot, big breasted 15 year old girl in a little black dress an heels that was 15 and .. I was like, hot damn! And yes, it was one of my cousins. We had to do the math and she's my 3rd cousin, so we would have been legal to fuck. We ended up hanging out together through in our 20's and .. I had regretted not sexing her up. And ironically, she felt the same way about me after I caught up with her 5 years ago. We could have been kissing cousins!