Have I ever steered any of you wrong? Karen knows just what medical advice to take!
Well, I'm not a nurse, though I have played one in many of your fantasies, right? We do know that Kaaren is the actual "Head Nurse" so maybe I'm more of a candy stripper!
So why not take advice from me, your local neighborhood, TG captioning domme who is looking out in your best interests. Trust me, my suggestions are much less harmful than our Glorious Leader, Big Cheeto Mussolini. Malaria medication without any sort of testing? When you've made the head of the infectious disease control center touch his face in disbelief, I dismiss your credentials to lecture me in any way that isn't about paying off porn stars or how to go bankrupt.
So trowel on that makeup so you don't touch your visage, well, you can TOUCH UP your makeup, but don't touch your face! Don't share lipstick with anyone else, buy your own, in many different shades! Nylons will keep your legs safe from the virus, and if you are scared of your tiny boi clitty being infected, have your mistress lock it up in a chastity cage, where it will be safe and snug! And of course, you'll need heels as high as you can handle, to keep your pretty face higher up off the ground, in case someone sneezes in your presence. Only semen should be flying anywhere near your face!
Do I make myself clear on all this ? Good, because I'm not doing any house calls. I will take it on the honor system that you are complying with Doc Mentia. Oh, and do not taunt Happy Fun Ball!
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Few loose thoughts:
I wonder if, because of the pandemic, couches are going to become a subset of benches? What are your thoughts on that? They are much less likely to be random, so there's that, but many couches are in public areas, like waiting rooms, furniture stores, etc ...
Are you telecommuting? I am trying to set up Zoom for conferences relating to work. Are you doing it commando down below or wearing a skirt and heels figuring they won't see what is below the desk or dining room table? If so, make sure you don't have any mirrors or reflective surfaces to the side or behind you or you might just give your coworkers a show!
Do you have problems typing the word couches? I keep typing "coaches" which is an entirely different thing! Damn my weird ass brain. I'm always reading headlines as something much wackier than it is supposed to be, though "Man Arrested for Licking Deodorants at Walmart" was about as weird as my brain makes them, but THAT one was true!
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Another blog exclusive, though everyone is free to share my captions as long as I get a link and an acknowledgement that I made it, so please do comment below. It's also a good way for people to check in and let the rest of us know that they are still safe. I am still up for more ASK ME ANYTHING questions. I would like to think they make interesting reading and can stimulate brain cells into memories we might have forgotten.
I swear that I am going to have to refrain from singing this while conducting a staff meeting on Thursday. At least I don't work for the Electric Company, because I'd have to start out by saying, "HEY YOU GUYS!" One of the benefits of growing up in New England was watching so many children's PBS shows that originated from the local affiliate. Antique's Roadshow is still produced by WGBH after all these years.
I would like to know how you ordering your new clothes online instead of buying them in store. I know you have to have extra packages of stockings out there!
ReplyDeleteI guess we're all on a similar wavelength this season, thinking of ways to avoid, evade, and escape the virus. I whipped up a weekend caption last night and it's on a 'cure' theme as well, although with a rather cheeky twist. :)
ReplyDeleteGive the time of year, what if benches became porches instead? Erotic teasing and exposure with social distancing built-in. I've been reading about the drive-by birthday parties and happy window displays . . . there must be a way we can co-opt that for erotic purposes!
Oh, and for the record, I don't have a webcam, so nobody at work needs to know what I'm wearing. I was actually supposed to get a new laptop with a webcam this month, but it no sooner got approved and we went into lock-down . . . and apparently the replacement is not an essential service. Sigh.
Love the cap! I could picture it as an entire ‘quarantine’ series. Day one, wear hose. Day two, apply makeup. Day fifteen, practice blowing your new master.
ReplyDeleteI most certainly believe that couches are a subset of the benches captions. A bunch of newly transformed men in their feminine glory sitting on “Coaches”. Hmm… I think I like the typo better!